Re-upholsterer T-Shirts

"You'll have to decide - become either an upholsterer or a re-upholsterer."

Saint George and the Drag Queen

"Ikea for hippies" 1. Flimsig used pallets, old foam 2. Stinkum goat wool 3. Beetup recycled lumber 4. Riskig kerosene lamp 5. Stupor hand blown by Nils 6. Smokum found on beach in Mendocino 7. Woblig 100% driftwood

'Don't worry. They say the first 24 months of living in a house during remodeling are the hardest.'

'Sigh. . .You work life balance includes me as well you know.'

"Can you believe Jim made all the furniture out of old rubbish?"

'For our next party, let's invite a carpenter, a painter and an upholsterer so they can help us clean up afterward.'

"My pillow mania got out of control so I'm limiting myself to just one at a time."

"It took a lot of work to build this car..."

The Move.

"You never giggle and read cartoon captions to me anymore."

'We're conducting a survey to find out how many married couples still have that old feeling.'

Recycling - Perfectly good bits you can't recycle or give away...

'I think it's time we got a new headboard.'

The Upholstery Consultant

"We hired all the designers ourselves."

Hanley Fabric Co., Polly-Esther

"I made it from a lost space probe."

Man looking in mirror and says 'help'.

Recycling Bin/Upcycling Bin

Decorators at Home

"Woulda looked cool with a beer in his hand, though." Michelangelo's cousin, Michelobelo

'Honey, I think you overdid the plastic canvas decorations in the bathroom.'

"Painted like this, finding furniture to match at least one colour should be simple!"

Second hand store: 'LEFTOVERS AGAIN!'

"It may not be the hardwood floor we were hoping for, but it's SO much better than that hideous carpeting!"

'Wind in the Willies' - 'It's an Andrew Davies version of the old classic.'

"...this is the one I like."

Non Drip Paint

Man to patient on couch: 'I'd like to help, but I'm not a psychiatrist, I'm an upholsterer.'

A second life for Grandma's quilt.

'My husband is all work and no play. Do you have anything that smells like an office?'

Her Flag project near completion, Betsy Ross ponders a patriotic way to represent the colonies when inspiration suddenly strikes her.

'What's the difference between Cream Amber Sunset and Pale Golden Butterscotch? Umm...the name?'

All Washed Up