Rank Admirer Pillows

"Five minutes, General."

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

"Boss, the AI is actually smarter than all of us! It read our business forecast, jumped up and ran out laughing!"

'No, it's not really good - that's our lawsuits-to-earnings ratio.'

If nobody had invented graphics

Robocop and Juliet.

"When they said progress made our replacement inevitable I thought they meant by AI."

Robot walking pet robot

First Prize!

"At lease we managed to stop the leak before the water reached 'E' Deck."

"The good news is I used AI to fill in my March tournament bracket and I won the whole thing. The bad news is AI has become self aware and wants the prize money."

"This next song is about my self-driving truck leaving me..."

Red hot little combo

Robot Cats - Cleaner, don't shed, and they're programmable.

'All I did was to connect an artificial heart to artificial legs, to an artificial kidney, to...'

"A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer."

"No, this is 111110100111101111 ... you want 111110100111101101."

'I saw an offbeat play the other night. No one took off their clothes.'

The Thinker

"Is that one of those cars that tells you when it needs maintenance?"

Machine consciousness - a robot thinking. The thought is in the form of a printed circuit board. The robot is a clockwork toy robot, to emphasise the infancy of the concepts involved

AI Toaster: "What's Einstein's famous equation?"

"There's the mailman!"

'But what do you sell?'

Actor talking to unimpressed child

'Oh, God I have to talk to a *****! Human!'

'Then, for some reason, sales dropped right off.'

'All the guys like Sophie. She has a touch screen.'

"Robot waiters are OK, but I just wish they wouldn't hover so."