Ranching Renegade Gifts

'The cows are out and are not expected back.'

'Say, Doc, I'll need more of that steroid stuff for old King. He's still kind of peaked. Must need some heavy doses."

LAY ZEE FUK

Glue gun? Glitter? Dang it, I grabbed my crafting belt again.

"OK, ready to go again?"

BLACK HOLES, the space path of least resistance.

Ready for a run!

Daisy Diaper Service

"It's a recipe from the 'Anti-Christ' cookbook."

'The recipe said to simmer uncovered!'

"Brilliant! And then all they have to do is stop them flying at night."

'Have you been using that Hairy Bikers cookbook again'

"Let's change table stakes to vacation days."

"Now, what? I'm wearing a hair net."

'Oh, sure -- NOW you set boundaries!'

'Did you follow a recipe book for this dish?'

"But you told me you were on gardening leave, so why can't you come and help me in the garden?"

'Looks like Ed Miliband's attempt to stop the race failed.'

Burn All Your Garden Rubbish

"When you are done exercising your finger, the cat would like to talk to you!"

'Mr Evans, I think we'd better reconsider our no-smoking policy.'

-You need a permit to fish here. -I'm doing okay with a worm, thank you

"I want you to start thinking back inside the box."

Problem solving centre.

Bill Tilden

Solar Storm Expected!

'I may not be an expert, but I know an ill-sighted wind turbine when I hear one!'

'Pay back time on the ranch'

Cluster Catastrophe

"You know how to whistle, don't you? Just pick up the phone and call the S.E.C."

Leonardo Meets the I.R.S.

Lawyers Playing Tennis

"...He's been going to work in a wheelie bin. He says its quicker, cleaner and less cramped"

"This recipe turned out awful despite me substituting every major ingredient."

It says 'item is returnable if repackaged exactly as sent.'"