Raining On My Tech Parade Gifts

'I can't get the hang of this cloud computing...'

Giraffe Umbrella

'Dang it, I just washed this street. Boy, every time...'

Where Indian ink came from.

Then get under cover before you are struck by lightning.

Man showing in the rain.

Two kids watch a duck swim past their window in the rain

Big Data Tonight

"This might surprise you, but not everyone finds the smell of a rain-soaked world invigorating."

Raining

Who should I call first? 911 or Technical Support?

"You are still here."

"Blood pressure 210/140. Heart rate 185. Steps taken 29. Sedentary 9.5 hours. Calories burned 19. You da man! Oh, and you're out of pork rinds." "Our classics TV marathon featuring 'Gunsmoke' will continue after..." "The unfitbit"

"This next one is a typical blues number about exceeding your data plan limit, cracking your ipad screen, and losing your new ear buds."

Washroom Doors: Men, Women, Computer Whiz.

"The central digital platform is temporarily renamed Project Schrödinger’s Cat. Until it is accessed on the 24th February it both is and is not a working system."

Drainpipe in a sombrero.

Weather channel.

"What burns my bottom about www.dazoosucks.com is that we capitalized them."

Lemonade fruit juice water stand and Umbrellas, sump, pumps, raincoats stand.

Robot Robber

Reading in the rain.

"When they said I'd been replaced by A.I. I'd imagined something more SOPHISTICATED!"

'Storm'

"Here's a blues number written about my inability to remember computer passwords."

Kangaroo golf-caddy.

This is a voice recognition service...we reserve the right to cut you off if you have an irritating nasal sort of voice.

Caveman to wheel inventor: 'Nice invention - how do you boot it up?'

'You would have thought that after millions of years of evolution, we'd have a drain-hole...'

'Stop! That's no way to get data into the cloud.'

Virtual Lap Dancing

"But you said that to make it start, I had to 'Boot it up'!"

Just north of the rainforest: the mostly-sunny-with-a-30%-chance-of-rainforest

Technophobes Illustrated Dictionary: Worm Virus - Something horny worms are at greater risk of contracting if they choose to solicit the company of worm-whores without protection.

"High Pressure Area"