Rain Race Fan Pillows

'First!'

Race track - with the race being to apply the white lines between lanes

"Oh, oh, it seems they've had a little trouble with the hand-off in lane number three."

"If you think I ride too fast, Susan...just say so!"

'Humans seem to be so weight-conscious: My rider weighs himself before each race...'

The polar olympics

'Geoffrey's kit car can go from nought to upside down in under nine seconds.'

The Unsportables: Relay

Formula One car origami

Hammer Thrower - "Let go of it!"

"Did you see neighhhhhh...bours last night?"

The Bagel Wheel Derby.

Centaur Sprinter

Pig Trotter

'I was this close to the finish line and then somebody threw a stick!'

'I believe you were first.'

"I want to report a race crime.'

'I havn't finished last years Marathon yet...'

1st Place in the Egg and Spoon Race

Racing pit crew member holds sign for driver: Stop And Ask For Directions.

'They're halfway through the six-meter dash. At this pace, the winner should break the world record by at least 24 hours!'

Plastic Brits: 'Apprehend that fleetfooted alien and naturalise him for Team GB!'

'I know you felt great after ten laps around the track, Mr. Fandella, but remember you were driving.'

The Priceless Ming Vase Relays.

Man planning on standing on a turntable to aid hammer throw.

The Race

Dog Scalextric

Birds watching car race wishing they had wheels.

'Soon I will have proved it ONCE AND FOR ALL!'

"Change down you fool! You can't hit a hairpin at that speed!"

"Where did this thing come from? It's a major trip hazard if you ask me!"

Young ladies playing 'Hare and hounds'.