Railway Etiquette Enforcer T-Shirts

"Would passengers sitting in the Quiet Zone please...Shut the F**K UP!"

Lynching on social media

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

"Mommy, look! He's man-spreading!"

"How to talk to people" "Make them rue the day"

Selfish shellfish - 'You kids share your food and stop being shellfish!'

'Knuth! How many times did I tell you not to play with the food??!!'

'Don't get up!'

"You need to turn down the vibration setting on your cell phone."

'Oh I don't mind you turning over my cups to look at the mark. But next time, please finish your tea.'

"More?"

"This time, let's not just fill up on bread."

"I know we're not supposed to invite them over the threshold dear, but it seemed awfully rude to leave him standing on the doorstep."

"This is Jim's second speech on how not to make people mad by talking on your phone. I missed his first speech."

"Gesundheit!"

"Tell him I can still hear him chewing."

Mime on invisible phone in restaurant.

'May I recommend the red wine?'

"You can rejoin your party if you think you can refrain from slurping your soup! Got that?"

"Would you please sip your drink and not swill it!"

"So, Claire tells me you ate her parents last night."

"I'd like you two to meet Will and Diane Clampett. Will is the powerful chairman and chief executive officer of a large multinational corporation, and Diane is his passive-aggressive wife."

'Why does the vicar keep saying 'Bless you' when nobody is sneezing?'

A guy steals popcorn from the man sitting next to him.

'Quicker to cycle anyway, mate...'

Man of refinement trying to teach a street salesman to say 'asparagus' rather than 'sparrow-grass'

"I've never seen a gimme taken on a fareway before."

"I've warned you about your offensive touching. Keep your hands off your face!"

Traddles and I in conference with the Misses Spenlow

'Well, I for one do not believe common courtesy to the host demands deck shoes.'

"Bobby, you may have worked for a circus but that's not an excuse for playing with your food!"

'Seriously, Earl. It's just embarrassing!'

"To save everyone from suffering in polite restraint, I shall eat the last slice."

' Hey...he's not eating like a pig.'

"At least have the decency to send her a text to tell her you're not interested."