Radioactive Explorer T-Shirts

'Rudolph, your nose!'

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

"You have to believe what you're doing will lead to something valuable, even though it probably won't."

'He's holding a sign saying he's marooned with 20 cases of La Tache. A second sign: drop a corkscrew and come back in six months.'

"The peasants are revolting Sire."

An early space launch attempt.

'Gee!' (doctor looking at x-ray)

Einstein discovers that time can stop completely.

Astronaut runs on spinning asteroid to reach space shuttle's tether.

'It's not a desert island - it's Australia.'

"We'll see how it goes. It's Santa's first year with the genetically modified deer."

"Now that I've made that perfectly clear..."

'Luckily, it doesn't look too serious.'

"Aw, Dad! I don't wanna move. I just made friends with a fossil!"

'I was working on developing anti-matter under laboratory conditions, but I couldn't find anything to keep it in.'

'Now we'll have to explain it to the press. Remember - keep it superficial.'

Cursing Scientist.

"You want proof? There's your proof."

Chemistry Improv Theater

"How the hell should I know what I'm looking at? You're lousy insurance doesn't provide HD X-rays."

If this plutonium should start to roam,box it's ears and sent it home.

"Whoa, whoa – for all I know you contaminated the sample."

'Just because the alignment of the system wasn't maintained during rapid sample exchange, it's no threat to your manhood.'

"The good news is your back surgery has healed perfectly. However, it looks like you may have to go back for a second exorcism!"

'I'm calling maintenance to tell them about the leak in the ceiling. The acid rain is neutralizing our basic research.'

"Delivery."

"Sorry darling - but mummy's augmented reality app, can't change Mr Ted into a Kardashian."

Augmented reality check

'Get a half-life Mrs Curie.'

Now, will someone pass me a whale?

'I know I told you this wouldn't hurt, but, if it does, raise your trunk or something.'

'I found a whole bunch of worms in the wheel wells!'

Two Pints Today Please.

'When you said this is the hot, new wine from Los Alamos, you weren't kidding.'