Raccoon Lovers T-Shirts

"Any idea how long your family might be visiting?"

'You know too much!'

"I sure hope there's something good in here. I worked up quite an appetite getting past that raccoon-proof lid."

"As I was only saying the other day..."

Don't worry, I see babies, lots of babies...

"I finally gave in, I got sick of hearing, 'Polly want a podcast?... Polly want a podcast!'"

'I don't remember this canoe being this heavy, do you Tom?'

"Waiter, there's a hare in my salad!"

"Can you believe he was the last dog at the shelter?"

"Having all the kids at home is a big adjustment."

Rubbish Carousel

"Overkill, dude."

'I object, Your Honor! Hearsay evidence!'

'You know darn well 'Aaargh' isn't a real word!'

"You spend far too much time on social media, Joe!"

'Get me everything you have on bunny rabbits.'

'I don't want you to think I'm a maniac or something, but we haven't had bunnies for over a week now.'

"There's nothing magical about if, actually I just have a knack for this sort of thing."

Magic Act

"I'm not trying to be cool, I'm just making sure the crocodile hunters won't see my eyes reflected in their searchlight..."

"Rest assured, anything you say in this office won't get repeated by me."

"I got a job!"

Finance piracy

'You're a smooth talker, Alphonse, but around here that's not enough.'

A Magician pulls a rabbit out of his hat while behind him a clown pulls a carrot out of his.

"They say this will keep us up all night like that's a bad thing."

"Oh, that looks fantastic! Honey, doesn’t that look delicious?!"

'You will never require the services of a dating agency.'

"Remember - you have sharp teeth and claws, but he has sarcasm."

'Polly wants a Nasdaqer...Polly wants a Nasdaqer...'

"Maybe I've been brainwashed, but at this point I do believe I actually want a goddamn cracker."

"You know, turning a hobby into a job kinda takes all the fun out of it."

"Don't repeat this."