Quirky Tax Enthusiast Gifts

'I'd like to think they contribute because it's the right thing to do, but I'm not above a short sermon on tax deductibility.'

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

Contrary to popular belief, the road to Hell is paved with a comprehensive, lifetime tax return.

Next time, a larger tip for the server and less free tax advice.

'As the government sees it, the U.S. budget would be fine if more deficit earners like you, Mr. Wald, go on the ball!'

'One advantage of having so many dependents is that I don't have to worry about income taxes.'

'We've gone to profit-sharing. But it's with the IRS.'

"Thank you, and may the I.R.S. accept all your deductions."

"You really clean up on these mileage deductions, don't you."

'Do you, John, accept a married tax allowance with Sandra ?'

"You may think the government is a big 'Giveaway' program, but you can't deduct your tax as a charitable contribution."

'How's daddy's little deductions doing?'

'Oh great, now I have to render unto Caesar, too.'

IRS, 'It might make you feel better if you just think of it as a negative entitlement.'

Congressional Budget Committee: Benefactor...Victim

'So, they weren't interested in your Robin Hood tax then.'

"It's no use, Super Rich! Your labyrinthine, yet entirely legal tax structures are too powerful for me!"

"Don't you think we should wait to see the effects of the new tax code?"

Footing The Bill

You want an extension? Good heavens, man, we haven't even paid for Reagans boondoggles yet!

'Which scares you most - Iran, North Korea, or the alternative minimum tax?'

"Look at that – they’re retreating!"

'Okay... now everyone smile and say: 'that;s not deductible'.'

'Aluminum siding will be used to cut costs in restoration at the U.S. Capitol.'

Osborne's Tax Cuts

"There's no business deductions like show business deductions."

'Wouldn't it be easier if the banks simply merged with the Inland Revenue?'

'You realize, of course, Death is the ultimate tax shelter?'

New Improved I.R.S.

Stimulus bust

'We're all wearing them - they were a gift from Warren Buffett.'

Romney: 'Corporations are people! We just pay a lot less taxes than you!'

"Our accountant is great. We were a C corp, but now we're a B- corp."