Quirky Routine Enthusiast Pillows

"Do you use a striped toothpaste...?"

"You know how it is, one minute I'm selling insurance in South Dakota and the next minute I have a hook for a hand. How about you?"

'Twenty years ago I began jogging five miles a day - could you tell me where I am?'

"You look great. One problem though: I'm the one who goes to work."

"It's kind of sweet when they're all settled in like this."

New Coat of Paint at the Sistine Condos

'Everything is automatic. The coffee turns on at 7:00...They go to work at 7:25 and we go up and get in their bed.'

A barbarian warrior eats his breakfast

Waking Up With Rooster.

"I'm upstairs right now. On weekends and holidays, I go downstairs."

"I'd like to see you every Tuesday, forever."

"No matter the weather or what's on my plate, I'm here at five. That's discipline."

"You were smart to come see, Mr. Lewis. These moles on your back definitely look suspicious."

'My husband does everything religiously except going to church.'

'And now for the (Yawn!) morning report....'

"You've become very predictable, Jack - home every night!"

"Ok Mr Rogers, that's enough bubblewrap."

Clock in, Clock out.

"I love you, Ethan, bit I floss alone."

"He misses his commute ."

"As long as there's coffee, life will find a way."

'I'm worried about my brother, doctor!'

Bad Hair Day

Wall Street-Os...contains Marshmallow Shaped Bears & Bulls

"Oh, are you attacking from home today?"

'Our dog's been dead two years but he can't break the habit!'

"I don't want a New Year, I want a comfortable, familiar, used year."

"Sundays we like to walk around being insufferable about our routine."

"I've decided to let you work from home, as long as you move in here and pay me rent."

Mountaineers milk.

Plain ol' me.

"I don't think coffee's gonna do it. You need batteries or something."