Quirky Robe Collector Gifts

And it even has your name on the pocket!

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

Larry's used art

Seagiraffes

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

"I warned you not to use that club...now look, you struck oil!"

"Will you have a Sphinx?"

Cut out and keep your own Christmas Caterer.

Raincloud Umbrella

"Sorry. I just find rotating my head helps me to relax during the test."

Duck Hunt

Thinks he's too cool for school.

Cheeze Wiz.

Early cyborg.

My Brother Al once went through a period of depression, your honor. He would just sit around in his robe all day. Then his psychiatrist got him out of his funk. Would you like to have his doctor's phone number? ? ?

Emergency Hipster Beard

"I don't know about you, but it always makes me feel kinda special."

Best before 65 million BC.

"Trust me, this is as weird for me as it is for you."

A man walks his dog wearing a cone.

Two circus clowns see each other dressed for a costume party.

"Dear? The toothpaste is on the top shelf. Don't touch the tube on the bottom shelf, that's Grandma's triple strength epoxy denture adhesive."

Ice shelfie.

"Oh, I'm thrilled with my new dog! He's sort of a hunter/retriever/plumber/electrician."

'Powdery stuff? Oh, that's egg substitute, from the Vegan lobby.'

"I don't think our smart home likes the color we painted it. It keeps spitting it out."

"Now, why didn't I think of that?"

'Anorak anoraks'.

A trevor of trainspotters

Fred Dinsdale - Forensic expert.

Inflating Boobs.

Dog selling toilet water on front lawn

'Don't you think it's just a little weird to have a cemetery for houseplants?!'

It's great for pulling the birds!