Quirky Quacker Pillows

'If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, looks like a duck, it' actually a gene-modified flounder.'

"They must be grown-up ducks, because they're eating the crusts too."

'RUN FOR COVER!!!!! It's another one of those 'Baby Showers'!!!

"No, ma'am. I'm not sure what the difference is between being creative or just plain weird."

Funky Facts: Football.

Best before 65 million BC.

"They followed me home from school - can I keep 'em?"

Alice in Wonderland: The Queen Turns into a Pack of Cards.

Mystery Solved - Boxers or Briefs, 'Thanks but you could have just told me.'

"Elementary, my dear Quackson."

A Knight Arrives at a Boiling Lake Filled with Monsters (Don Quixote).

Football Crazy strip six

'If it 'tells' the time, why do I have to look at it?'

"What would you like me to play next?"

Ostrich Curoisities

"When will I be old enough to have an inner child?"

"Albert is the first whistler to use hearing aid feedback as an intro to one of his tunes."

'Geez, I hate these fun runs!'

"Rob is a functioning train wreck."

'But why do you want to transmute asparagus into cotton?'

Real Estate Personals

"The board is going to have to talk to 5-G again."

What's the antidote for wheat germ?

Bald man with a brush on his head

Kid goes to Hideaway Bakery and sees a sign for a sale on upside down cakes. Cakes are upside down.

Annoying xylophone solicitors.

Fred questions whether Dr. McWit's Quick Draw Stress Tests are AMA approved.

"Nah. I'm a crow. Some jerk put bleach in the birdbath."

'Am I covered if a car falls on my tree?'