Quirky Option Seeker Pillows

'And here's our burial at sea, where we cut you up and flush you down the toilet, it's simple and fast.'

"Stock options for your thoughts."

'We've financed three more startups for no fathomable reason.'

"The following programme contains scenes of a very noisy vacuum cleaner."

"I'm from brokers without borders. Invest in deserted island reits!"

God putting the finishing touches to the Pug.

'All those in favor of having anchovies on our pizza will signify by saying aye.'

All bets are off as Round One begins in the "Dollars versus Donuts" World Championship title fight.

wattle covers

Ball as water-melon.

A watch face with Stonehenge

'It's another corporate lawyer...do we want to buy a soul?'

"Waiter, this is the worst meal I've ever tasted. And believe me, I've eaten some crap!"

Customer entering bank that is touting number of toasters given away

Where Deviled Eggs come from

William Tell's lesser-known first son- Stanislaus Tell.

Auto parts, Lite Puff Pastries, & Health Insurance Exchange.

"Roadkill cookies"

"This IS my day-to-night outfit"

Santa's Helpers

"Pass that."

Regifts of the Magi

International House of Excrement

'Worker or Soldier: Is that all you can suggest? Not much of a choice is there!...'

"What seems to be the problem?"

'Hey! You're not for real, are you man?'

'If you're out and about today don't forget the pith helmet.'

"I'm glad I don't have to put gas in it. the downside is that it takes a lot of time to put 3,000 AA batteries in it."

'...You're just not built to take selfies.'

'Buy two pounds and I'll throw in the sword.'

"I'd like these invested in an aggressive mutual fund."

Notorious gangsters, Bunny and Clyde.

"Okay, it if makes you feel better...yes, I have stock in a banana company."

I'm getting old, I spotted a couple of brown hairs among the punk.

"That's $20 for you if you pluck the tail feathers off my rival over there..."