Quirky Optics Fan T-Shirts

'It's a bird, it's a plane...it's superman! Oh brother, a bird and a plane aren't even close to the same size...I really need some new glasses.'

'Do we sell 'trinoculars?''

'How aout this one? Better or worse?'

'RUN FOR COVER!!!!! It's another one of those 'Baby Showers'!!!

"Yes, I know they fit, it's just not what I pictured for a three car garage!"

"....Oh, and the dog's eaten all the fridge magnets."

Four Common Lampshade Mistakes and How To Avoid Them.

"We're looking for something for our panic room."

Open House of Horrors

"I've had these glasses since I was a kid, when my doctor told me I'd grow into them..."

"Trust me. Don't do it."

Would you make up your mind? I can't keep letting you in and out all day.

"Sometimes, Cheryl, I wonder why you only invite me along to cocktail parties."

Four olives and a toothpick on Newton's Cradle.

The Soundness of Newton's Laws

The water desk

"We're out of flowers."

Galileo's Attempt to discover is heavier dog falls faster than lighter dog.

'Focus! Focus! You've just gotta' forget about their home ground advantage.

'Driving without a flag?'

Optician and the PI.

"He's at that awkward age."

“Mileage is great, but I need to customize the leg holes.”

Crossword bathroom tiles.

'Another artisanal B&B.'

Cat gets caught eating the cuckoo from a cuckoo clock.

HAPPY HOUR 4:30-5:30, 'Oh, the prices don't change -- we just serve the beer in cartoon-character glasses.'

John's invention of a 'motorised' bar stool proved to be great fun.

Crazy paving company.

Tapped Tree

'A Dust Cow'.

"Ever since I said I liked creative ties, things have gotten out of hand around here."

The Booger.

"Yes, it is strange...usually he reads the 'Daily Gossip'."

"Love the exposed chessboard."