Quirky Match Seeker Prints

'The dating website just asked for a recent photo. It didn't say it had to be one of me.'

Love at First Sight

"Oh, God, no, please, no, God, no..."

On my list of outdoor pursuits I put skinny dipping way ahead of this.

"I don't understand it! My nerd detector's going crazy!"

"The way you look at me, Craig... you really see me."

"Ooo... she sounds nice... 'I enjoy burying myself in the sand and sideways walks on the beach.'"

"Your online profile says you like to foxtrot."

"She says you sound like 'fun'!"

"I'm not very good at sex, but what do you say to eight hours uproarious sleep?"

Woman finds sensitive mechanic to date.

"Well, Arnold, it's been fun."

Sinlge-white-male seeking single-female who enjoys, silence, long long walks, and scorpions.

"I like anything but long walks on the beach."

Here's one for you... she likes long lurches in the moonlight, scared of fire... enjoys terrorizing villages...

'Romance-minded clown in hot pursuit of woman'

'I think I met Frank at the circus.'

'Single Heating and Cooling technician in search of intelligent, attractive woman. Send picture of your furnace & AC.'

"Here's one - 'Few-bricks-short-of-a-load seeks One-our-out-of-the-water.'."

"Okay. So, apart from being a very shy ventriloquist, is there anything else you can tell me about him?"

'Aunt Val's pretty cool. . . Kind of hot actually. . . for an older lady.'

'You must be Olivia.'

A businessman watches as a girl walks past carrying a balloon with his face on it.

"So tell me again where you're from."

"I'm a fancier of dogs and interesting men."

'And to think that only yesterday I was a lonely scientist and you were a failed experiment!'

Symbiotic Connections

'Oh, come on, Theima - for once in your life do something wild and crazy.'

'Are you ready to be the winners?'

"In a world of beefcake, I'm dating tofu."

At Saltwater Sweeties Dating Service

"Damn. The minute I eat a stink bug, in walks Mr. Wonderful!..."

"Would you consider yourself creamy or crunchy?"

Face painting vs bottom painting

"How about we chill out at my place with a bottle of Mateus Rose listening to my vinyl seventy eights?"