Quirky Lab Fan T-Shirts

"We lost our grant and now look."

"Yes, I know they fit, it's just not what I pictured for a three car garage!"

Antler Buzzers.

"Trust me. This is going to make it easier to discuss your childhood."

"Oh, oh - it's getting into organic."

"He's a Crocodoodle."

'Focus! Focus! You've just gotta' forget about their home ground advantage.

Yeah? Delivery! Come on up!

"Mr. Wilson? I'm Dr. Bradshaw. Please come in."

"You will note that their ability to comprehend, assess and process information increases dramatically when Professor Podhertz throws in the cat."

'Extreme acupuncture.'

Crazy paving company.

'Bloomin rare breeds.'

Hugs and knucklebumps don't mix.

Sewing Machines in Surgery

'Why can't you just chew bones like other dogs?' (dog smoking pipe).

"The statistician is coming over to explain why this is perfectly normal."

'No doubt about it. As long as they don't understand the concept of medicine, the placebo won't work.

"Do these jeans make my butt sound big?"

"I can't help being annoying. I'm a Pain-In-The Saurus."

"You know, ever since I've started working here, I've had this craving for cheese."

'Some people think they're ugly. I think they're appealing!'

'No, seriously. I'm in medicine. Cutting edge stuff. I work in a lab downtown.'

Meerkows.

"Oh, stop complaining—you know she's terrified of the nail clippers."

'The doctor said you should cut down on the 'love bites'...'

'If we didn't do so well in this easy box, they wouldn't have given us this complicated box.'

"The trouble with being a platypus is that you feel out of COMPLIANCE all the time!"

Early bagpipes prototype show Scottish man playing a wailing cat.

"Sometimes I'll open a random safe deposit box and fart in it."

Bands That Never Made It.

'Meet Regan the vegan, Ray the gay and Tommie the commie.'