Quirky Kitchen Adventurer T-Shirts

Bear: 'I can't sleep, so I'm going to rustle up mid-February snack.'

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

"First cook the cake, then apply icing sugar and candles..."

Frank and Ernie's Diner. We're all out of pressed duck, sir, but I can put the squeeze on some chicken for you.

Bedtime Stories with Gordon Ramsay

I don't know what happened to the poor guy, but he's visibly shaken.

I made you a cake!

"It's a recipe called no-cook fish chowder."

'Your fingers are in the soup?' - 'Of course they are. It's freezing in that kitchen.'

The Inexperienced Cook

Junior Masterchef - "Darren Smith and I'll be cooking chicken nuggets with Mars bars in a CocaCola sauce"

'Dinner will be ready soon -- the submarine sandwiches are soaking now.'

'The cake timer dinged, Mom, and so did my stomach.'

Cheese Secret

Time for pancakes!

'Just add eggs. That sounds easy.'

'If they rise they're scones. If not they're pancakes.'

"We didn't have any whipped cream, so I used foaming hand soap."

Mrs Jones's fish pie could be smelt for miles around!

Egg Surprise

Summer Holiday activities the whole family will love.

But I followed the recipe exactly.

"Just remember...the main ingredient in all my dishes is love."

'I don't care what the timer says - my nose says they're done.'

'The good news is I invented fire today. The bad news is I burned dinner.'

Chernobyl Chow

Not a Creature was Stirring

'Well, that's the last of the garlic repellent.'

"I'm following the paleo diet. Not that there's much choice, of course."

"Mmm....say, cookie! What's this garbage you're feeding us?"

"1 pinch of salt, 3 pinches of baking soda...oh dear, a cup of flour? How many pinches is that?"

Salvador Deli

Woman finds something in her soup.

April 12,1989: The last day Ryan ever ate pancakes. 'I ran out of pancake mix so I fried up patties of my facial cream.'

Eating raw cake mix.