Quirky Idea Lover Pillows

"I'm afraid Mr. Edison is too busy to discuss your idea what you at this time. Please call again, Mr Fluorescent."

Bar snacks served in bird-feeders.

"He's an abstract artist."

"But some of my best ideas come while I'm in the litter box."

"You're about to learn what New York hot dogs are made from."

Dummies for Dummies.

"Great tights!"

Half-A**ed Publishing Presents...

'That's right...his appendix...and it's pure dynamite! Don't you see? It'll be the ultimate insider celebrity memoir!'

'As a hairdresser, I must say you take it a bit far.'

Air Dentistry

CW 'Text' Yomp Sidekicks: Attorneys-at-law,

Hague Convention Defied! Failure of the new Tommy-Scalder.

Day in, day out, dodging traffic, dashing back and forth. And for what? Nuts. My whole life wasted on a bunch of nuts.

Rare Books / Exceedingly Rare Books / Never Published Books

'Edwin, I hop you'll come home in a good mood. The decorators hung the new wallpaper today.'

'I'm thinking the bee beard is the main reson that you're still single'

'No, it's not one of those fake arrows. I had my head pierced.'

"It has tremendous possibilities."

The idea for tiny drink umbrellas is conceived.

Bottom House

Ass-less Chaps

'I've always admired Gary's penmanship.'

"It's a new rent concept - fifteen minutes for a quarter."

An Eskimo baby pram in the form of an Igloo.

For years Melenie stayed home waiting for the stirrup cords revival.

The world of interpersonal relationships was dealt a blow today when John Gray, author of Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus, finally came out of the closet. In other news...

"No, it's not a religion or a cult. It's a fashion statement."

Conductor and Quasimodo.

Paradox in the Wardrobe...The mango mail-order boxy pants were very, very, very roomy as advertised, and yet they were somehow confining.

'I've created a new bug electrocuter, but the down side is it takes a lot of time to say their little insect heads.'