Quirky Health Buff Gifts

"I'm still thirsty. Maybe I've got leaky gut syndrome."

"I hope you are enjoying the walk..."

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

"I have to rest. The 'check engine' light on my activity tracker just came on."

'He's fine, it's only man flu not swine flu.'

"It's good you're avoiding radioactive pieces of your destroyed home planet that deprive you of your superpowers... but you should also watch the sodium."

'Those fish-oil treatments doing your arthritis any good?'

Extremely Practical Jokes.

Looking at magnetic polarity one understands why an apple a day keeps the doctor away.

So, have you had this 'human flu' yet?

A doctor calls a body builder to perform a patella tap test on a large patient.

"I've just overheard the doctor say the farmer has the flu! We all know what that means: chicken soup!"

"You were smart to come see, Mr. Lewis. These moles on your back definitely look suspicious."

"Can't talk now. Cramming for tomorrow's stress test."

'When I die could you preserve my liver for medical research? You've done that already.'

"Your husband's laryngitis will probably last another wee but your blood pressure is nothing short of miraculous."

Zika Mosquitos

'Dinosaurs might have survived if they'd gone to health clubs.'

'Bovine Growth Hormone.'

Man exiting store: 'Since I've been taking the bee pollen, I've been stopping to smell the roses more often.'

What, I'm the only one suddenly craving walnuts?

"The good news is your weight and cholesterol are stable. The bad news is the research has changed."

Fruits and vegetables

'Gasp! Wheez! Nobody told me that once you have a heart you also need cardio!'

'It's some sort of side effect of swine flu!'

This guy smells like he just got the Covid vaccine. Do you think it's safe to bite him?

"My Harvard Medical Guide says if a wisdom tooth is infected, you may need antibiotics and possibly have the tooth pulled by an oral surgeon."

"I'm looking over your results, Mr. Dumpty...and your cholesterol is dangerously high!"

'Frankly, the diet I'm putting you on will include things that you probably wouldn't consider 'food' as such.'

Gym. Stay young through diet and exercise. I find it much easier to just lie about my age.

Vaccinating the Easter Bunny

It's not a tongue depressor, it's a used popsicle stick. If you can name the flavor, your taste buds pass the test.

'I'm worried about my brother, doctor!'

Doctor to man: 'Laughter is the best medicine, but it's not covered in your health plan.'

'No thank you, I'm on a diet: I've noticed that the fat ones disappear first...'