Quirky Focus Appreciator Pillows

"Eyebrows."

Rent a Room With Hot Water

-"What has this got to do with communication?" -"It's my invention...the hand smiley."

"Hope you don't mind—it was his last request."

'Yes, Super-Supreme pizza... Delivered please...'

"Me? I'm taking the dog for a silly walk."

The songwriter who wrote a bridge about his bridge.

At home with the leeches: 'No, you can't have a Quorn tartlet - just drink your blood and be quiet!'

Viking with bike handlebars on helmet.

I suppose this probably counts as an adverse event.

'Right, I'll see the chap who thinks he's a fly next.'

"One large with cheese, pepperoni and grass clippings."

"...so you then developed an addiction to buying toilet rolls. Wasn't that rather expensive?"

'No, but next week, the fireworks start in earnest.'

"Are you binge watching again?"

"That tie, Merrick. It's not your friend."

'These are humans. Normally they are quite harmless, but if you touch their food or make fun of their beliefs they can become VERY aggressive.'

'The last thing I knew he was on a plane to an obedience school in Omaha!'

"An old man uses a stick grabber to pick up a cigarette."

Spring Rituals

"Could you watch my elephant while I nip out a minute?"

Man says: 'It's got quite a nose ... I'm getting notes of nutmeg, a whiff of autumn harvest and rain-sodden undergrowth, and with a tart, elderberry finish. Not bad for a urine sample, eh Doc?'

"I have heated your beer in the microwave because you told me you like hot drinks!"

"And look - rooftop cup holders."

The Traditional Board Game Company.

"It's alright,lady-cleaning 'em yesterday qualifies you for a freebie today!"

"It's these new glasses dear! I thought it was you!"

"Sometimes I pretend to be normal, then when I get bored I revert to being me."

Complaints Department

This episode would be known as 'The sink of doom!'

"Some of us negotiate our contracts better than others."

'The Dockland Spirits came with the Jacuzzi.'

'I really hate operating on circus folks !'

'I have a phobia of couches'

"Edward attracts light."