Quirky Experimenter Gifts

"Can I call you back? We're in the middle of transitioning from tree-frog allergies to bioterrorism."

'Well, Hamilton, we can add 'discharge shotgun' to the list of things people who live in glass houses shouldn't do.'

"The hardest part was teaching him to use the hedge trimmers."

"I'm afraid we disagree on the definition of random."

"That's Dr. Cray conducting research."

scientist

Yound Einstein disproves an early theory: 'Aha! A watched pot DOES boil!'

"I crossed a piranha with a hyena. . . a piranha-ha-ha."

"Perkins! What have you gone and done now...??"

"It's not an experiment. I'm just making coffee."

"Sara, we're shutting down your energy efficient home display until Andy's volcano is dormant again."

Gracie invents a smart spray from her science kit.

"I'm trying to make milk out of wool."

'Eureka! Corduroy grease! The answer to fat thigh zippity-zip!'

Sorry Doc, but once I start pulling on a thread I just can't seem to stop!

'Oh, wow, you found my science project and it works!'

'You say Merezenski did the exact same experiment, but did Merezenski add chocolate syrup at this point?'

Scientist with test tube.

Uncle Mort, have you been playing with your home genetic engineering kit again? Guilty. I was trying to clone my own DNA. For laughs, I mixed up my genes with compost. Mixed up? Technically, cross-bred. Trump is a meathead! Well, you're a vegetable.

Recombinant DNA Lab. It's a Rhinocerose!

"One day mommy's slime molds will all be yours!"

"How did you become interest in science?"

Thank you for not asking how my experiment is coming along.

Need Supercomputer to finish my PhD, Please Help.

Chemist builds animals instead of molecular models

'Let's see what else will explode in the microwave!'

"What lead you to growing human tests in a test tube?"

"The instructions for the beer-making kit you gave me? Didn't need them -- I figured it out for myself. Drink up."

'I wish they'd hurry up and fix the wind tunnel.'

Genetic Fingerprinting.

"The trouble is, professor, you see the Erlenmeyer flask half empty and I see it half full."

'I don't KNOW what I'm doing -- this is pure research!'

The Abstract, The Modernist, The Avant-Guard.

'You knew I was a mad scientist when you married me!'

"Welcome to the French Quarter!"