Quirky Dining Enthusiast Pillows

Suddenly Harold froze, trying to remember if he had ordered a side of roaches, or if this was a gross violation of public healthcare policy.

"Have you folks eaten here before, or shall I explain the concept?"

Our Troubled Chowders

"My name's Aldred and I'll be your server this evening."

"Is a 'Five Turds' rating a good thing or a bad thing?"

Fresh Fish Restaurants

'At 'Chez Henri', Madam, we never explain and we never apologize.'

Salad Hat

Tall man has a tall menu, whilst a small woman has a small menu.

"It's in case there's a fly in your soup, sir."

Self-Service Restaurant

"Vitamin B6, Vitamin B12, Calcium, Kelp, Brewer's Yeast, Aspirin?"

Reserved space is reserved for a dinner table.

Kentucky Fried Horse

Eat Locally - All Roadkill From 8-Mile Radius

"So, I went into this fancy new butcher shop and they were selling ostrich of all things!"

Sushi Train Spotters

"It's a combination of pizza and sushi and taco and egg roll and...it's just something everyone loves."

"Give him his food."

"Can I have a doggie bag to go?"

'I don't eat red meat. That's ok, this is gone green.'

'How d'you want your eggs - down your pants, over your head...?'

'What on earth is this? Hedgehog soup.'

Food inspection results

"The insect menu is very popular nowadays."

"No, we don't have field to plate provenance for each bean."

Roadkill Restaurant

"The catch of the day is halibut. The day it was caught was last Tuesday."

"We only do salads. There's no need to keep warning customers that the plates are cold."

"I can highly recommend the peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwich, served with a chilled glass of milk."

"Is everything all right? Any reactions to the irradiated carrots, the transgenic tomatoes, or the antibiotics in the chicken?"

Fast Food Restaurant

"Nice going, Larry. They're going in after your liverwurst and sardine sandwich that fell behind the fridge last month."

"Please be advised that our new chef's policy is that you're not allowed to leave until you've finished all the food on your plate."

'Who ordered the chef's head?'