Quirky Coordinator Pillows

3 Pointless Things To Do At Christmas: Add a little festivity to your favourite fast food/Look up an old friend/Murder the Scotch.

A desert island with a knotted palm tree

"I'm busy this afternoon, but I can crayon you in for Saturday."

'That large, rolled up newspaper is a reminder - mess up in this office and you'll pay the price.'

Armstrong? Why did UPS just deliver a microscope, a robotic arm, a huge incubator, a nucleus extractor and a dozen lab rats? Well, it's certainly not so I can replace you with an army of clones programmed to work for free. Well

'This is impressive, Roberts, but I'm not sure that it qualifies as work-place leadership.'

'I'd like to leave my pacemaker to the medical institute, my artificial lung to the research center, my false teeth to the dental clinic, my dacron arteries...'

"I don't consider a missing four million dollars to be 'monkeyshines'."

"I think I see a miscreant in the carpark. There's no time to call the police I must deal with it myself."

Office: Empowerment Drawer.

"Jenkins, come in and pull up a bean bag."

'We'll talk later, Ed, but for now we have a quick and dirty solution to your objections.'

Melvin likes to indulge his inner child.

"You don't look a day over 30,000."

I've refiled all your letters under L.

'Stick and Carrot Business Incentive Consultants.'

When he was between Executive Assistants, filing became a challenge for Jonathan.

"Ah, Stevens—sit anywhere."

"The boss is the fatherly type. He never fires anybody."

"Good to have you aboard. Now, let's meet some of the oddballs weirdos and eccentrics you'll be working with."

'Quick! Look cute!'

"Right before I die I'm going to swallow a bag of popcorn kernels."

"Would someone dim the lights? I'm about to launch into the paranoid and conspiratorial portion of my report."

Bad Office Planning

Self-Employment

'Thanks for making it guys. Come on in and pull up a chair.' A square hole in an office floor where chairs can be pulled up from

'Now THIS is my idea of a creative department.'

"He doesn't like dinosaurs."

VARIOUS ITEMS OF LABELLED KITCHENWARE.

My motto is "A place for everything and everything all over the place".

'The bartender referred me to a shoe shine boy, and the shoe shine boy referred me to you.'

"Lots of people have writing partners..."

"This one is less distracting."

Cavewoman has block of ice with refrigerator magnets on it.

'They're both great quarterbacks, but I chose Matt as my starter because he's dating a celebrity!'