Quirky Cookie Critic Pillows

Jane Chastain

"Better bring me another cookie. The last one fell in the water."

"I can't give you a prescription for milk and cookies."

Do you have any cookies you aren't using?

'Darn those neighbors. A cookie's missing.'

Sign: 'Welcome to Fernbanks. Beneath our quaint Norman Rockwell-ish exterior beats a big-box chain store heart, ready to sell out at the drop of a hat.'

"You have a co-pay...two cookies and a glass of milk."

'This fortune cookie says 'buy oriental tea futures'...'

You know, the snowballs we get in the summer are better. They're flavored!

Miracle Mom #5,293

"Mom said eat everything in moderation, so I renamed the cookie jar 'Moderation.'"

Cookie Surveillance

"Roadkill cookies"

'I don't think I've ever heard of the Geezer Scouts or Geezer Scout cookies.'

Ginger's bakery: Our Cookies Snap!

"I don't know, Doc, it's just that lately I've been feeling crummy!"

What if retail stores behaved like websites?

"I'll give you a cookie if you promise to paint me as a pillar among women in your future memoir."

'We seem to have more luck getting people to accept cookies rather than broccoli when they visit websites.'

"Put away the gummy candies and bring out the apples. The kid's mother is our dentist!"

If you give a mouse a french cookie

Girl Scout cookies selling the girl scout.

'Sorry, sweetie -- they're not that kind of cookies.'

'The doctor said my body is 40% fat. These cookies are only 20% fat. That's got to help.'

"Who wants to help Grandma make her famous gingerbread man cookies? You kids get the flour, eggs, and sugar, and I'll get the protoplasm and epithelial tissue."

"The cookies are always stale."

"That's just great! Enough with the public displays of affection!"

"Do you know donuts have fewer calories than you? I guess that would explain your muffin top."

"So which one of you pesky dogs stole the last cookie from the bottom of the jar?"