Quirky Cohabitant Gifts

'Mr. Knucklepopper, I'm putting Ms. Gumsnapper next door. This way the percussion is all in one section.'

'All I want for Valentine's Day is a Greek fisherman's cap.'

Penguins flying to igloo birdhouse

Your spirit animal is a balloon poodle? My spirit animal is a balloon poodle!

"The saving grace of living with someone who has AD/HD is that any arguments you have over it never last very long."

"After two years of dating, we decided it was finally time to move in together."

'He's strictly an indoor cat.'

'But you have your own drawer - what greater display of commitment could you want?'

"That word-puzzle gloat of yours is getting old fast."

"The words 'complete screwball' are not in my vocabulary."

Trouble Ahead

"My husband finally taught him to use the toilet but can't convince him to give up kitty litter."

Sinlge-white-male seeking single-female who enjoys, silence, long long walks, and scorpions.

"This is where you'll be sleeping."

"Ok Mr Rogers, that's enough bubblewrap."

"Good night. Sleep quietly."

I think my girlfriend is moving in.

Love is Love

"Hey! Your ad said 'non-smoker!"

"It's our fault. We put out milk & cookies and now we can't get rid of him."

90% of annoying habits are discovered after you start living together.

"Lots of people have writing partners..."

'Oh no, it's that 'come hither and do the dishes' look.'

"You go right on snoring, doesn’t bother me one bit. Your snores are beautiful, do you know that? I love snoring…not like some people."

'I always assumed you were a cat person!'

"Why can't you just read in bed?"

"Do you know how distracting it is when you spin the chamber on that revolver?"

"No-one nit picks like you..."

'Oh I can't stay here, i'm allergic to shell fish.'

"What they hell are we looking at."

"Your hogging the covers again."

"Can I move in with you?"

"... Yes, I know there's a hole in your ceiling. Why do you think we're called, the star view motel?"

"It's god's little get-back.... She had special haloes made for those who never put down the toilet seat."

Ask Sadie. I'm anxious to have a companion. When will this happen? -Ron from Chicago. *Actual reader questions. Ron, what a coincidence. I am also looking for a companion. Do you give foot rubs, clean the house, do what you're told and keep your frisky hands to yourself?! Your search is over, sweetie bear. Ask Sadie at asksadieshow@gmail.com