Quirky Clotheshorse Gifts

"I wouldn't mind going for a bike ride,but I don't have any clothes that look stupid enough."

Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.

Great British Eccentrics.

Bookstore, the Politically Incorrect Guide to You.

"They followed me home from school - can I keep 'em?"

"Honestly sometimes I'd like to pretend I don't know you!"

'Oddly enough you're the third person to buy that today!'

"It's a great story, funny and entertaining - and better still it's not won a single prize for literature."

Mountain climbers, "Someone's been here before us."

"Next time you meet me dressed as a giant boy, it's going to cost you a pair of diamond earrings."

"How come in these days of downsizing and lower expectations, all these sneakers come with ridiculously long laces?"

"Must you use the cat's litter box to practice your sand trap swing?"

Bird reading '1001 pickup lines' - 'I'm getting ready for mating season.'

Victoria's secret lovers: Barry, Al, Percy.

The Cricketer and the Golfer

'I'm sure it's a violation, but I can't find it in the rule book.'

'Wow - My kind of man.'

"De plane! De plane! De bird! De bird!...."

'Good book?'

"So, you're telling me that you can't return, 'How to be a secret agent' because the final chapter instructed you to eat it after reading?"

"We understand each other and respect each other's privacy." "That cat hates me."

Bird in sunglasses balancing on a stick.

Curling Rocks!

'Perfect - as Sir will know, the fashion is for the looser suit this year...'

Discus accidents.

Gigolo Diary

'The sleeves are short and the pants are baggy.' - 'It's really you sir.'

Louse and garden...

'... And this is the home gym, where we hang all our clothes.'

"Hmm, offhand, I'd say you have a nasty case of tennis elbow!"

'What the . . . no wonder we can't gain any yards. We've been fitted with radio collars...'

Older cousin press

Pyramid Garden