Quirky Advertisements Gifts

"Get another cab, Dad. This one is creepin' me out."

"That's our new church mascot."

Floss Street Vendor

"Remember, you're selling home appliances, so look more ... dishwashery."

Child selling cold lemonade in the winter

'A free goldfish with every house you buy!'

Sun Dried Ice Cubes

'...hmm ...I predict an upturn in profits this year.'

Doomsday marketing

"Ooh, this one sounds interesting, 'Single, vegetarian, bulbous, with moves like a lava lamp.'"

Marv's Preowned Vehicles...That new car smell can kill you! - Buy Used!

"Can you believe they're watching the same back-to-school ad?"

Advertising meets cryptozoology...

"See? You don't need fancy window displays to attract attention...just get some police tape!"

'You may know us by our generations of disciplined, global investment strategies...or perhaps you like the 70's heavy metal rock band we use in our commercials...'

'He brings a bizarrely different perspective to our marketing.'

Johnny Appleseed's less popular brother, Joey Kiwi.

Free Hamster, "That's novel, getting a free hamster with every meal."

"Please visit our website and tell us about your experience with this sale. You can win a gift card good for a free glass of lemonade."

'So do you have any marketing strategies that don't involve 'Really Big Shoes'?'

"New super select-a-size! 1/2 sheet, 1/4 sheet, 1/8 sheet (make-up remover), 1/16 sheet (spider killer), 1/32 sheet (booger getter), 1/64 sheets (zit squeezers)."

Our Staff Picks

Woman on desert island reads message she finds in a bottle: 'It's an ad for a diet club.'

"No need to mention that the one owner was a driving school."

'It's true, you're a big star: The Zoo has posted photos of you all over town...'

Alt. TP

'It's half as good as our $10 special.'

Frankenstein's monster writing a lonely hearts ad.

For a good trial, call Ed Beegley attorney...

'Do you want to buy this cow from 'Windy Field Farm'?'

Fake Leprosy Bumps - No predator will touch you.

"No kidding? After appearing in a cat food commercial, you signed a sneaker deal?"

Rejected Product Mascots

'Eat at my place, I'm very lonely'

100 Fat. Now with 50 less fat.