Quippy Character Mugs

Knock Knees

Backfire

"You can't compare apples and oranges because oranges have longer legs."

"Happy anniversary, dear… 'happy wife, happy life!'" "That's because nothing rhymes with 'happy husband.'"

"All dishes marked with an asterisk are served with sarcasm. . ."

'I'm not taking that money to buy drugs. I'm taking it to pay bribes if I'm caught with my drugs.'

'Is the water cold?'

No one knew it, but Gerald was about to execute what he called 'The Move.'"

"I expect you all to be team players - except Ted, whom I expect to remain team mascot."

Victorian Gentleman

'I just had this sudden urge to stand out in a crowd...'.

'My dentist recommended it.'

"The board is going to have to talk to 5-G again."

Real Estate Personals

"Sometimes I'm sorry I ever ran away with you."

"I beg to differ."

The Mad Hatter finally gets taken down.

"So who else is gonna be there?"

Bald man with a brush on his head

Access Denied!

'He's always been a bit of an eccentric...'

A mad scientist.

"Have you ever licked cream off a woman's body?"

"We're all loonies on the moon, you know."

"Nah. I'm a crow. Some jerk put bleach in the birdbath."

"Presenting a Few of New York Curiosities"

"So, Mr. Igor - why do you want to be a laboratory assistant?"

Freak Family.

Flatware Follies.

'I don't think they are playing with a full deck.'

"We're not all grim you know - I'm a happy reaper."

"Larry, did you water the plant?"