Quick Meal Maestro Gifts

Tartine

"Just bring me something that's going to look good on social media."

"Waiter! Two of your finest menus!"

'We can order Lebanese, Thai, Italian, Indian, Greek or Chinese...'

'He doesn't ask for a menu... he asks for an estimate!'

"Baby Jackson Pollock"

"Have you decided on what you'd like to have?"

"You have a big check because you had a big wine."

Burnt or Raw?

'What'll it be?'

"Nobody truly appreciates the magic that goes into a good omelet."

Impracticle Guide to Having Babies: 'Feeding'

WHACK!

'We're not at home, Stu. You can't just order 'I don't care'.'

"This alphabet soup is in Times New Roman. I ordered Segoe Script! May I please speak to the chef?"

"I bet you can't name one person who makes a better lengua casserole than me!"

"We suggest you study the menu in our reading room before being seated in the dining room."

"I'm unable to process this image."

'How do you like your steaks? Scorched, burnt or cremated?'

'This 'homework,' was it done today?'

"All good things must come to an end...unless I use both of my giant-size super-pots."

"Fridge-to-table"

A butcher and his apprentice.

"I got into the coffee for the wordplay."

"Mum, why can't we just have a normal Sunday roast like other families?"

'Why do my parents have to be professional chefs?!'

Woman watching cookery show on TV while cooking a microwave meal.

"Oh -- I've got one! If you could have dinner with anyone from history, living or dead, who would you have cater it?"

'You followed the recipie but it's missing the secret ingredient: Mom.'

"I don't like it."

'. . . the Winter of Discontent Soup, Arab Spring Roll, Summer Madness Salad and The Season of Mellow Mists Fruit Medley.'

'I dunno. Maybe we need a new slogan.'