Queenly Tales Fan Gifts

Queen Ranavola of Madagascar executed any of her subjects who appeared in her dreams....

"Agamemnon and Clytemnestra have decided to separate amicably."

"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down, broke his crown and Jill said 'I told you so'."

A Fairytale Update

Robinson decided to name him 'Casual Friday'.

Here be dragons.

"Can't you do something more creative than messing around with cupboard doors?"

"Snow White! It's the dancing, singing woodland creatures wondering if you want to go down the pub."

Password Error: Snow White and the seven dwarfs not recognised as eight characters.

"Well, that one got away."

"When I ask questions, I expect answers!"

'If I told you what I wished for, you'd probably slap me.'

"Siri, who’s the fairest of them all?"

'Put some feeling into it. I can't tell the difference between the lion and the mouse.'

'What do you mean, you're tired of the rat race?'

"If you insist on doing all the voices, Dad. Don't you think father bear should have a deeper voice than Goldilocks?"

"Snow White swears by these 10 products for flawless beauty."

'He was a handsome young prince when I married him.'

Hansel and Gretel Day School.

The Optician At Home: "....And it didn't fit the other sister, either. Then Cinderella tried on the glasses, and she could see perfectly."

"Tonight I'm getting together with pals to sit around and croak."

The Frog Prince

'Don't let the photo put you off, it was taken when he was under the spell of a wicked witch.'

'Hurray for indoor plumbing!'

One of the Three Little Pigs reaches puberty.

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

"Like that?"

'Actually, there's no interview necessary. Just pull out the sword and the job's yours.'

"Papa Bear was too much, Mama Bear wasn't enough, and I always had to be just right."

"When are you going to stop blaming everything on Goldilocks?"

"I'm sad to hear everybody lived happily ever after. That means no sequels to this story."

Kissable Frogs in Your Area

'And the wicked stepmother looked into her smartphone and said, "Selfie, selfie in my face, who's the fairest in this place?"