Quantity Surveyor T-Shirts

"No, it wasn't a sinkhole. Your old TV was so heavy the ground could no longer take the weight."

'I'd say he's 10 percent 'pet' and 90 percent 'Lord and Master of All He Surveys'.'

"An un-observed universe ceases to exist. Yeah right!"

Tension filled the tent.

When Engineers Crack.

"You're right -- this town is big enough for the both of us."

'Promise me you'll say Yes / No / Don't know ...'

"Bob wait, let's do the survey first! Sir, on a scale of 1, poor, to 10, excellent, how would you rate our chase today?"

Explorer with enormous magnifying glass.

"Scientists confirmed today that everything we know about the structure of the universe is wrongedy-wrong-wrong."

'Shouldn't we be doing this online?'

'Please, Ma'am — I'm running out of paper!'

"All right, pal, I'm just saying, that's what I'd do if it was my Large Hadron Collider."

'I was working on developing anti-matter under laboratory conditions, but I couldn't find anything to keep it in.'

'Can you spare a minute, madam - I'm doing a king of all I survey.'

"It's an interdimensional portal that can facilitate travel across both space and time... but we mostly use it for storage."

Why the discovery of the New World took longer than expected.

"You call yourselves a demographic?"

"That's it - I've had it up to here with measurement devices."

'What makes you think the basement leaks?'

'For? Against? Undecided? Uniformed? Apathetic? This is one accurate poll!'

"No, he's not in right now, he's out demographing."

"We seem to be at that point where particle physics leaves of and theology begins."

Surveys and economic interests

"A survey found 82% of people think surveys are a waste of time."

'My God Pearson you're right. All these years the greates scientific minds have been looking for the theory of everything and all we had to do was Google it!'

'5.40pm on the 2nd day....and still waiting for the surveyor'

"I see you have experience marking territory."

'Don't worry. The first 30 years of being an inspector are the hardest.'

"Oh dear! Low-cost housing."

Time Travel Research Lab

Results of the Tropical Fish Sex Survey