Qualification Seeker T-Shirts

'Being able to 'Raise the Dead' is all very well but I'm afraid it's not much use without the appropriate qualifications.'

"I wish I had her jewelry." "I wish I had his wife." "I wish I had her figure." "I wish I had his money."

"If it doesn't happen on Facebook, it didn't happen."

I put a picture of my lunch on Facebook, and nobody hit "like." Who doesn't like Slim Jims and beer?

"Biff's old money, Angelo is new money and Boris is funny money."

Keeping all the balls in the air - skills

Do you have any other skills?

"It's just one monkey at one typewriter, but we've given him an infinite need for validation."

"No, I'm not really a CEO. I just like to keep up with the Joneses."

Wouldn't it be cool if we could live in the Middle Ages, Randy? We could roam the countryside on horses and carry swords. We could hang out in taverns and drink ale, maybe earn enough coin to hire a hero … Then we could go on a quest. Maybe slay some golems. I think it's a real sign of intellectual maturity that we haven't even mentioned maidens yet. Real Middle-Ages maidens would eat you for breakfast.

I'm looking forward tot he day we can afford some real statues for this place.

"I can remember when having a '212' phone number still meant something in this world."

Big Shot/Bigger Shot.

'But this is what you demanded; a corner office with Windows.'

'I have everything a man could want - But I've still managed to hang onto my petty ambitions.'

'I chose my field on what would put the most impressive initials after my name.'

"I'm good at ticking boxes."

"Attention, wanna-be son-in-law ... we're losing!"

"Does this desk make my job look big?"

Give up all my possessions? Did I say Buddhist? I meant Boatist. I'm a boatist.

"Only three hundred and sixty-seven followers? Maria's not an asset to the abbey."

"I hear you've got friends in high places...?"

"You like it? It’s from the MoMA Store!"

'It says here you can talk trash in five languages.'

'Can you believe it, Harkins? Out of all those offices, not one person is more important than I am.'

'I need both hands for steering.'

Interning in D.C. Volunteering in Seattle. Trekking in Nepal. Lucky ducks! I'm stuck here working 2 jobs! Wow! You're getting paid?!! Who knew? Employment is this summer's must-have status symbol. Some parents envy you.

"Wow! I knew you were rich, but I didn't know you were that rich!"

"Brooklyn is the Manhattan of the other boroughs."

Sports car style baby buggy.

'This condo is the height of luxury, The sprinkler system sprays Perrier,'

'I don't need such a big office as this. My ego does.'

"The boss loves the positive feedback he gets every time he says something."

"I just wonder if the brand name is too obvious."

'I'd do better if I knew all the words you know!'