Puppy Wranglers T-Shirts

"You're training puppy to be housebroken? Looks like she already knows how to break a house!"

"His real name is Major, but everyone call him GET DOWN!"

Tourists and their Pets.

Toys in the DVD Player.

'Technically, he's on a leash, so I say we let this one go.'

"Another reckless baby driver! I'd arrest the whole lot of them if they weren't so damn cute."

"I couldn't possibly lick another baby right now."

'Beware of teething baby.'

'Hey, Mom, here comes Frankie's tailor!'

"Why do small children ask so many questions?" "Why not? We need to learn, don’t we? Anyway it’s no big deal is it? Isn’t that what parents are for? You were probably the same, weren’t you? So why complain?"

Climbing with the baby

"The 'Queer Eye' people came by - but they fled."

'Don't worry. I'm using carpet shampoo.'

Baby zipping himself up then going to sleep

"I'm sixty three in human years and the mother of octuplets. Again."

'Gee, Dad, Mom's getting better at this all the time!'

"I work out of my house filled with kids and pets. My hobby is trying to keep sane."

'They had three puppies and four kids before me: It's almost impossible to find a piece of furniture that hasn't been chewed on...'

I think these suits have feet in them so we won't leave prints

"My dog always knows when it's about to rain."

Babies

Show Jumping Tantrums

'I can grant you 3 wishes as long as none of them are about getting up on the furniture.'

Naughty Puppy Dog.

I'm fed up with cleaning your room! From now on, wipe your feet!

"As I see it, the issue with dog-walking services is that the pace is dictated by whoever is slowest..."

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: 'Winter Clothing'

'Well, your wife is now a den mother! You have triplets!'

"How may times do I have to tell you to flush? Gosh, will I ever get you potty trained?!"

Coping during the 6 weeks school holidays.

'Getting other people's toddler's leftovers on a highchair is one thing, but getting their toddler, too, is another.'

"Logistically impressive Hodges, but does this qualify you for a leadership role in the company?"

'We really should ask the driver of that car for tips on coping with twins.'