Puppet Haters Gifts

"I'm sixty-six – I don't want to see puppets in anything."

A Puppet Named Juan

'How are the ventriloquist lessons going?'

Leslie Caron.

"And now, for your entertainment, I will drink a glass of water while Rempert, here, remains eerily silent."

Personally, I was hoping for more from the intermediary process.'

'He does.'

"I believe we have a quorum for the meeting."

'Why, I don't exactly know -- how long HAVE we been here, Bobo?'

'I sort of thought your presentation was going to be in powerpoint.'

"Personally, I of course loved Uncle Clarence, but Mr. Quibbles wants to say a few things."

'Oh, I don't have a problem, doc. My friend here has a problem.'

Octopus Puppet Show (colour)

Bride with a ventriloquist's dummy.

"I don't know, do you think we evolved from the sock monkey?"

Ventriloquist Grave

"At bonus time, just don't forget where you get your intellectual property."

"You'll regret saying that, I'll get my own back in tomorrow's performance - you'll never work again!"

'Just reading the minutes back will be sufficient.'

"I've called you here to discuss some issues because this big sissy didn't have the guts."

'And to think I was worried it'd be lonely at the top!'

"What is it Doc, I can handle it."

'I see the critics say I need a new partner.'

And now, for a rebuttal.

"I told you we should have had separate trials."

Pubertry

"I'm not great at communication, but my little buddy is."

'You ought to get out more according to experts.'

Writer Puppet

"She said don't forget the straw."

"I feel like we're finally making progress."

'David, can't you speak for yourself?'

'I must admit, this family reunion hasn't really lived up to my expectations.'

'Are you hiding something from me? Is there someone else?'

'I know, but he's a genius.'