Fans Of Puppet Jokes Gifts

'I think you should know, I have woodworm'.

A Puppet Named Juan

'How are the ventriloquist lessons going?'

Leslie Caron.

'He does.'

Personally, I was hoping for more from the intermediary process.'

"And now, for your entertainment, I will drink a glass of water while Rempert, here, remains eerily silent."

'Why, I don't exactly know -- how long HAVE we been here, Bobo?'

"I believe we have a quorum for the meeting."

'I sort of thought your presentation was going to be in powerpoint.'

Octopus Puppet Show (colour)

"Personally, I of course loved Uncle Clarence, but Mr. Quibbles wants to say a few things."

'Oh, I don't have a problem, doc. My friend here has a problem.'

Bride with a ventriloquist's dummy.

"You'll regret saying that, I'll get my own back in tomorrow's performance - you'll never work again!"

Ventriloquist Grave

"I don't know, do you think we evolved from the sock monkey?"

"At bonus time, just don't forget where you get your intellectual property."

'I believe there's an unseen hand behind everything we do.'

'Just reading the minutes back will be sufficient.'

"What is it Doc, I can handle it."

"I've called you here to discuss some issues because this big sissy didn't have the guts."

'I see the critics say I need a new partner.'

'And to think I was worried it'd be lonely at the top!'

And now, for a rebuttal.

Sorry, I'm already spoken for.

"I'm not great at communication, but my little buddy is."

Writer Puppet

"I feel like we're finally making progress."

"She said don't forget the straw."

'I must admit, this family reunion hasn't really lived up to my expectations.'

'David, can't you speak for yourself?'

Pubertry

'Are you hiding something from me? Is there someone else?'

'I know, but he's a genius.'