Pup Trainer Gifts

'She always comes to my ringtone. It's the sound of a can opener.'

Polly txt speak

'I'd say he's 10 percent 'pet' and 90 percent 'Lord and Master of All He Surveys'.'

Facts of life - The birds and the dogs.

"I think therefore I am." "Bow Wow, Bow Wow, Bow Wow."

'Bert's dog training.'

"There's really not much to obedience school. Just listen up and do what they say."

"Hey Lady this is a sixty zone!"

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

"Moments like this make me glad I taught you how to fetch mojitos."

"Oh well, I guess I'm lucky that he's not a duck hunter."

"I'm not growling, it's my stomach rumbling!"

"Is that true, Charles? You leave your crap all over the house?"

"Watch out, Simone's hangry - her stomach AND her throat are growling."

"How long is it since you took Benji for a walk?"

"You can stop pulling, you knucklehead—I took your leash off ten minutes ago."

'Other dogs howl at the moon, I've trained mine to play Bach.'

In life there are things we cannot understand � the words 'get down,' invisible fences, cats...

Pavlov's Puppy

"Let's break the record for non-stop deranged barking."

Dog stretching before a walk.

"Not a bad list kiddo, but I know them all! I've told you it's hard to teach an old dog new tricks..."

"I wasn't howling at the moon. I was singing along to my iPod."

"If he tries to dip, Mrs. Callister, you mustn't hesitate to use the choke chain."

Ezekiel and his Dog: "Have you been in the valley of dry bones again?"

"Settle down boy, they're not actual cat-fish."

"Don't even think about it."

Another reason Chihuahuas hate basketball.

Dog Training Academy and the Cat Anarchy Club.

'Look, Dad! -- I taught Shep to walk on his hind legs!'

"But this time, Lucky, when I throw the ball... you bring it back!"

"You're missing the whole gestalt of Frisbee!"

'I suppose an explanation is in order?'

''Junk Yard Dog' just sounds so much cooler.'

'Actually, she's turned out to be a very clever pet. Watch when Rex stands up, she'll feed him a biscuit.'