Punctuality Puzzle Fan T-Shirts

"You arrive early, You work hard, You stay focused. What's your game?"

Can You Spot the Differences?

"Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama?" "That's right." "What's right?" "Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama." "Why are you asking me?"

Excess Baggage: When you are on a cruise and they say the ship leaves at 5:30, they really mean the ship leaves at 5:30.

Rubik's ice cube.

'Look a huge bird!'

'Think about it: If we blow up the bridge, they'll have to swim across again...'

A dog and a robot dog

'Sir, that efficiency expert you hired called -- he said he'll be five hours late.

"Help! Set me free!"

Big Ben

"So we`re going out and you haven`t even bothered to change?"

I've been studying reverse psychology at Tonga Tech Online University. Seriously? Nobody's going to go to a psychologist who's got a diploma from some random online college. And psychologists have to have a whole arsenal of treatments. They can't just use reverse psychology for everything. So what you're reverse-saying is, I'll be sought-after and highly effective. No that's ... ok, yes, that's exactly what I'm saying.

"Hmm.... I think I'd better keep this to myself."

If you should be in this meeting, but are reading this instead - you're fired!

'Sorry I'm late!'

"Is that a new watch?"

'That's Watson, away on the stroke of five as usual.'

Late for a date,,,

'You're late for our meeting again'

Tic tac toe.

'Think about it: If you eat me now, you won't get an egg every day...'

"Congratulations on your retirement Spencer. The team suggested a gold watch but I thought it more apt if I present you with the office clock you've been watching so much for the past 35 years."

"Sorry I'm late for the breakfast meeting."

"You're late."

"Well, if everybody does it, it must be o.k."

"I like getting to work on time. I just wish someone was here to appreciate it."

"Of course, 'today seems to be dragging more than usual'. You came in on time, for once!"

Why do I always get stuck behind a slow driver when I'm already late?

'Sorry if I'm late.'

Geographic Oddities. It defies logic, but Little Rock is a bigger city than Boulder.

"Okay people, pagers, beepers, and cell phones ON."

"You're early."

'In our thirty twon years of marriage this is the first time Barney's been late for work.'

"He's on your 'personal computer'. . . his name is Norman and he's really good at mental arithmetic."