Pumpkin Protectors T-Shirts

So those are your 'weapons of mass destruction? - Slugs?

Prize vegetables.

Knock on the door - dog stands up and shouts 'Beat it!'

No Soliciting

'That'll teach the pesky python to be greedy and eat all my chickens!'

"Harry?... Is that you?"

'My secret? Stay away from Halloween candy.'

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"We're looking for a 5000 step walk."

Happy Halloween. Something's different about her. It's boo!-tox. Every Halloween its the same thing. They take candy off the house and never come to the door. That careless jerk almost trampled me! What was it? The "Heedless" Horseman! I know it's just toilet paper, but as a mummy it still gives me the creeps!

"Why... are there so many people who never eat pork? Because we have some excellent PR people working on our behalf."

'I'm sorry young lady, but you're not old enough to be free range!'

"Someday, my son, that will mean you."

D.C. Halloween

'This month I'll be cooked & my bones ripped apart in a wishing contest.'

Halloween sculptor

'Arghhh! He's got no face!'

"Your candle has gone out."

'She thinks of them as her children...'

"You're lucky you don't get carved this time of year."

"Can i get a transfer from the porcupine enclosure..?

Headless Horserider uses a computer

Climate change hits Antarctica

"I had to get braces."

"It's a very simple procedure. We slice off the top of your head and scoop out your innards with a spoon."

'Aha...Hmmmm...tsk, tsk, tsk!'

Be afraid. Be very afraid.

"How did getting carved make you feel?"

Halloween dentist.

F&E Dentistry. Happy Halloween. That pumpkin doesn't have any teeth! He never brushed --- It's a plaque-o-lantern.

"When's the last time you flossed?"

A woman has mini scarecrows in here flower garden.

'I went under the knife. Do you like?'

'It's true what they say - we're a nation of dog lovers!'

"That reminds me, your Dentist called."