Public Service Satirist Gifts

Royal Mail Privatisation

'Williams, we're not used to receiving such excellent ideas as these, so we'd like to tone them down a bit.'

"Nation-building never works."

"You're fired."

"Oh, I'll be bi-partisan alright, punishing both sides of the aisle."

The Signing of tthe United States Constitution

"So we are agreed then, most of the targets we've set staff are completely unreasonable and we should just scrap them."

"'I don't want war'. . . well, wither our translation program is broke or this president has a strange kind of humor!"

Flags

"We seem to be spending more on defence than on things to defend"

"DeepSeek" "Stargate"

"If we can just get beyond this 'I'm the boss' mentality and concentrate on a simple 'What I say goes' outlook, I think this will all work out."

Summer 2000: Children stumble upon the remains of Linda Tripp's old head.

"That report on corporate redundancy... I'd like it in triplicate."

Reagacentennial

"He could have been the national bird, but that was a long, long time ago."

Sign - Halt manager crossing

'You can just forget about the cake.'

"You're on a what?!"

'We haven't improved quality, but we've made it easier to return.'

"Excellent, excellent. A fine blend of truths, half-truths, and blatant falsehoods."

The International and May Day Terrorism

"I want to dispel the rumor that this redistricting map was drawn by my toddler on an Etch-A-Sketch. . .I'd never met that toddler before."

Donald Trump Removing Aggressor Label From Vladimir Putin

The economy.

"Who gave you permission to ask for a raise?"

"We won!"

"VP J.D. Vance called Donald: 'cynical asshole,' a 'moral disaster,' a 'total fraud,' an 'idiot,' and suggested he might be 'America’s Hitler.'"

"The regular Fox news commentator was canned for being too soft on Iran. I'm Dick Cheney."

"Whoever made Keir Starmer did a sound professional job."

Kritik's Korner

'Ah, it's so precious to witness a child learn how government actually works...'

Trump leaving

"Everyone stay calm, if we don't upset it maybe it won't start shooting."

The americanisation of vulture.