Pub Regulars Pillows

'What a pleasant surprise, and just what kind of fly-fishing do you do?'

"Deja Bu!"

'One door closed, another opened, and I fell right out the window.'

'Let's keep it simple -- stop serving me when you run out of beer.'

Men in bar lament olympic beach volleyball ending 'I miss beach volleyball too.'

Two men attempt to use the same snooker cue.

"Who are you looking at?"

"What on earth do they find to talk about?"

"He could have been the national bird, but that was a long, long time ago."

'No ice.'

Best Before 5th Pint.

"Them's cat-fightin' words, Arlin!"

'I know it's gassy...'

City Boy.

"I think we may be related!"

"It's kind of sweet when they're all settled in like this."

Men's fragrances...

"Stranger, you're sitting in the boss's personal spot. That's why they moved the dart board over your head."

'Here comes your own personal weekly beer supply, Joe!'

"I forget to drink."

Fleeting illusions of happiness hour 5-7

'Beer's more than just a food -- it's a comfort food!'

'You can't come in here with that.'

'A man has to believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink!'

'I'm having trouble with my drinking. Arthritis in my elbow.'

"Just water for me, please."

"You want to know why I drink?. . . I drink to forget!"

'She thinks I'm out every night training for the London Marathon.'

"What's a nice girl like you doing in a bubble like this?"

'No Fred, this one is one me!'

Redhead

'Would you say your glass is half empty or half full?' 'Whose round is it?'

The Endangered Species: Your Local Pub

'Your switching to Scotch? And after I've given you the best beers of my life!'

'No more for me, thanks - I've already had a skinful.'