Pub Humor Enthusiast Mugs

Fireman attempts to rescue trapped children from pub foot rail

'Who was that Brad?' 'Ahh,just an old girlfriend of mine.' (an old lady walking away in background)

'I'm sorry, boss, but you tell them to leave.'

JOE'S BAR, 'You can't call Joe a racist for throwing you out, dummy - you're both WHITE!'

Freudian Bar & Grill...Jungian Pub: 'We can out drink those Freudians ant day of the week!...'And twice on Sunday!' ...'Yeah!' ... e

'Gimme a Canadian club on the rocks!'

Complementary Beverages

"I just saw some confused old goat pee all over the bathroom floor." "That was a mirror. And that wasn't the bathroom."

"So who ordered the 'Yo-ho-ho and a bottle of rum on a dead mans chest'?"

'These drinks have been watered down.'

'Did you or did you not tell me to collect EVERYBODY'S glasses?'

Virtual Lap Dancing

"Harpy Hour."

"I feel like I've just been played my whole life."

"Fetch and roll over weren't enough-then they sent me to philosophy classes."

"Let's have some fun, guys -- Let's walk into a bar."

"I couldn't help overhearing what you ladies said about all the chlorine in the toilet water, and I could not agree more."

'He's clever alright-just watch him dry up when it's HIS round!'

No shirt, no shoes, no service.

"Oi, who are you bleedin' looking at?"

Bar, My dog doesn't understand me.

"If that's the chief medical officer I'm not here."

What's grey, has four legs and a trunk?

"I'm not sure I can really help you. I've dealt with hundreds of rodent infestations, but I've never even heard of Beerkats!"

'My beer's not cloudy. The glasses are dirty.'

"...And then I forgot where I put my memory stick!"

"I should give myself up... I'm a bad habit!"

I'm used to seeing crocodile tears when I tell off a man in this bar, but this is the first time I've seen crocodile exclamation points. ! !

No glasses to be taken outside.

All I'm sayin is let he who has not driven naked and stoned cast the first stone...

'Hell, no, I don't want any sake.'

"In an effort to conserve water... I've stopped having it in my whisky."

"Leave the toilet."

Guest Beers/Guest Urinal

'I'm glad you credit my Martinis for helping you break out of your cocoon, but I'm still cutting you off.'