Proud Parent Club T-Shirts

"His first fax."

"Mom, Mom, watch me!"

'All my children have been successful. Frank here is in the Oval Office.'

"It's amazing, Darlin', just how fast the kids grow up!"

"Her first word was 'paparazzi'. "

Cry babies.

'I'm Jeremy's father. I'm a computer consultant and I'm unemployed.'

Impressing dad.

"Those are the names of your children? I went a different route...I memorized my kids' names."

"Your children are adorable...and so shiny!" "Thanks. I them in dish detergent."

'You must be very proud Daphne.'

"Mother, I think I'm good enough to exhibit on the living room walls now."

'Sure, a drawing on Facebook has coverage, but nothing wows the family like a spread on the fridge.'

Children's artwork exhibition.

'Well, he's definitely got your nose...'

'I'm afraid he's at that age when he's into everything!'

"Isn't he the spitting image of his Dad?"

'Oh Darling, you must be so proud: Your first wart!'

"Study her closely...the laughing eyes, the dimpled smile...she's got 'em right where she wants 'em."

"I won it for being the most noncompetitive in preschool."

'Baby's first two-step.'

'Wow! Your kid looks a lot like you!'

'She posted her first blog today.'

'Is THIS the way you plan to spend your peak learning years?'

'Son, I want you to get out there and play like I've never played before.'

'It could have been worse...she might have chosen banking.'

"We're so proud. Only 5 months old and already knows how to scroll and swipe."

'Dear, Junior ate his first house today!'

'It's too early to say but my lad may be good enough to swim professionally.'

"He looks just like your husband."

"Oh, she talk a lot...but only about her children."

"Vanessa has done a not bad de Kooning."

'Oooh, Jimmy, the teacher put another throwing star on your paper! Great!'

'He spoke his first words today Serge - 'ello. . . ello. . . ello'!'

"Little Lucas doesn't go anywhere without his weighted blanket."