Property Protector Pillows

No trespassing. Violators will be shot. Survivors will be prosecuted

"She's a good housekeeper, divorced 3 times and kept the house every time!"

"Whoa now, hold on hold on! I just wanted to read that sign there. I couldn't see it from the road."

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

What are you giving Mother Earth this year?

'What motivated you to become a environmentalist?'

Rare earths are the key to a greenwashed, technotopian future

The Environmentalist

Deforestation.

'Don't feel bad — all tree huggers get a splinter now and then.'

North Pole

'If Earwigs looked like baby seals:'

Nature versus commerce.

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

'I want to make a positive environmental statement - What do you suggest I order?'

"Stop the throw-away mentality! Save resources! A New Year every 750 days is quite enough!"

"I need a deeper access to his brain. Only google has the records."

Natural Disasters

"We finally reached net zero emissions."

'Humans & Lemmings have a lot in comon...'

Eco-Anxiety For All Seasons

How can he sleep so comfortably knowing that pillow will someday be clogging a land fill...

"I love you too, big guy."

"I just assumed that the whale we adopted would stay in the ocean."

Child protects planet with umbrella.

It beached on a pile of plastic bottles, so they were able to just roll it back out.

"No Frodo, we are still many leagues from Mordor. This is from a wildfire by I-5 west of Bakersfield."

"Have you tried turning it off and on again?"

'To help save the environment, I've replaced all of our lightbulbs with compact fluorescents. Now I'm running the old ones over to the landfill...'

"Global warming is a great icebreaker."

Just Stop Boil

The creature from the trailer by the dried-up lagoon.

"Oh, honey, look! Just under that candy bar wrapper, next to the empty Bud Light can and to the left of the plastic bag... a salamander!"

'Well, kids, it all started with a massive Federal program to combat global warming....'

Yeah, I know what you're talking about: humans have an unhealthy interest in my horn too...