Property Peruser Pillows

'Not had problems with the shared driveway, have we, dear?'

"I agree, the place was a tear-down, but I just remembered we were only renting it."

Man sees sign stating dog for sale, house and land thrown in.

"One day, my boy, all this will be retirement homes."

'You always bring me the same thing every year, toys games sports equipment. I never get what I really want!' - 'What's that?' - 'Real estate!'

Stop and Birch

The Big Book of Suspicious Crawl Spaces

'I thought I would rent it out for the extra dough.'

"Look, son, real estate."

"I think we could be very happy here until we aren't."

'Well, the rent is a bit more expensive than usual because there are only 1 327 482 other tenants...'

Realtors: 'We make house calls'.

Home Sweet Second Home.

"I'm a real estate developer and I'm just looking over this area."

'We did have one property in your price range, but I'm afraid we sold it in 1943.'

"This one has nicer sand, but I think I prefer the tree on the last one we saw."

'So what if you found it? Whatever it is, it belongs to ME! Now, get off my beach!'

'This is close enough.'

"Ok Mr. Bisley, I'll admit it does need a bit of renovation..!"

Starter Homes

Dog Realtor

"Obviously the price of this property is a reflection of it`s very desirable location."

"You've got termites."

'Don't wait too long to decide. A house with a view like this can go at any minute....'

'It looked a lot bigger in the photos.'

'It seems good, and he said the bit at the bottom is the name of the architect.'

"And the bathroom has a water view...if you fill the tub."

'A free goldfish with every house you buy!'

'I think you'll find it open and spacious!'

"Do you have one with a bigger mud room?"

"The landlord has promised to sort out the damp problems."

Man in woods sees sign, 'No Trespassing', next to 'Go Ahead - Make Our Day!'

Couple wanting to buy the estate agents office.

'I need to get a bigger place.'

"If a sixth borough opens up, I'll let you know."