Professional Critique Lover Pillows

Filling the Missile Gap

'Does anyone else have any complaints?'

Master's Degrees of the Universe

An acceptable level of TV violence.

The Real Russian history

"I like it, Julian — it speaks to what a waste of time and money your MFA was."

"Well...I notice a little criticism on my leadership style..."

"They're going to print a retraction - your desserts are not inconsistent."

'I didn't choose art. Art chose me!'

"I loved your embarrassing personal essay in the 'Times.' "

Rubbish, Poppycock, Balderdash

Cartoon Editor: No, No, No, No, No, No, Maybe.

'Too many cliches? Now hold your horses!'

Nutty Assistants

A man is looking at a sign saying Exhibition of art exhibition jargon.

Critics In Love

Editor

Art is a cruel mistress.

"We had to lay off most of the staff to pay for the consultants."

"I don't want it to look like I don't appreciate your qualifications and experience, but you're talking a lot of crap."

"Do you mind if I give you feedback?"

'Your trouble is that you don't appreciate good food.'

Ezra Pound

Fake Diplomas

Lather, Rinse, Repeat.

'I really don't see the point?'

Hosni Mubarak blinks

"Your earlier work was better."

"Is it a witty and insightful exploration of the zeitgeist of 'boundaries' or is it in fact, the way out?"

'You're husband's death is an absolute tragedy, it's going to play havoc with my monthly mortality targets.'

"Well, the x-rays show you have a little arthritis in your hands, but mostly they're just poorly drawn."

The Letters Of Jean-Paul Sartre To His Mother

"This is an intervention. It's clear that you've resumed your habit of reading the reviews."