Professional Boxer Gifts

kangaroo with boxing gloves

'Lyle! You grabbed the wrong mouthpiece!'

Doc told me I have brain damage. As my manager responsible for this, it's time for me to damage yours!

'You'd be a good boxer except for two things. . .Your hands.'

'It appears Alzedo is toying with his opponent.'

'Now I want a good clean fight!'

'What happened?' - 'He was knocked out when they threw in the towel.'

'Alright, gentlemen, I think we'll dispense with 'cheese'...'

Rocky Marciano

'I'm glad you guys could work this out in a reasonable manner.'

A young Don King

'Tony, you always try to lead.'

"Let's consider an early dive."

"Let's get ready to bumble!"

Nun Fight.

All bets are off as Round One begins in the "Dollars versus Donuts" World Championship title fight.

"So, what are you reading?"

"This round, forget the finesse. Hit him."

'I'd better make a note of your blood group...'

"You may inflict pain, but it mustn't be severe or prolonged."

'But he's supposed to tell everyone how much you weigh! '

Trainer: I'll warn you now Johnny, don't underestimate this guy. If he gets you into a corner, he'll clean you up.

The Boxing Glove Diet was working for Bertram.

'Just remember, he's bigger, but you're funnier. As soon as he starts laughing, you've got him!'

Mayo-A-Mayo

'It looks suspiciously like Killer Hart is taking a dive!'

Early Exercise Machines

'He's a bit confused after that last round.'

'I can't believe this.. biggest fight of my life, and I forget to pack a wallop.'

Wordplay: Rabbit Punch.

'Come off it-she only said the guys will be fighting over us because you said we lived UNDER a boxing club!'

"Now, now, relax. All you're gonna feel is a quick jab."

Teacher boxing book: 'As I told you, today we're gonna really hit the books!'

Caricature of Noam Chomsky

"... and come out fighting, boys."