Professional Boxer Gifts

kangaroo with boxing gloves

'Lyle! You grabbed the wrong mouthpiece!'

Doc told me I have brain damage. As my manager responsible for this, it's time for me to damage yours!

'You'd be a good boxer except for two things. . .Your hands.'

'It appears Alzedo is toying with his opponent.'

'Now I want a good clean fight!'

'What happened?' - 'He was knocked out when they threw in the towel.'

'Alright, gentlemen, I think we'll dispense with 'cheese'...'

Rocky Marciano

'I'm glad you guys could work this out in a reasonable manner.'

A young Don King

'Tony, you always try to lead.'

"Let's consider an early dive."

All bets are off as Round One begins in the "Dollars versus Donuts" World Championship title fight.

"Let's get ready to bumble!"

Nun Fight.

Muhammad Ali publishes a popup book.

"You may inflict pain, but it mustn't be severe or prolonged."

"So, what are you reading?"

"I told you not to invite that guy!"

'I'd better make a note of your blood group...'

"This round, forget the finesse. Hit him."

'But he's supposed to tell everyone how much you weigh! '

Trainer: I'll warn you now Johnny, don't underestimate this guy. If he gets you into a corner, he'll clean you up.

'It looks suspiciously like Killer Hart is taking a dive!'

'Just remember, he's bigger, but you're funnier. As soon as he starts laughing, you've got him!'

Early Exercise Machines

He's slow and can't see out of one eye, but watch out for his left hook.

Mayo-A-Mayo

The Boxing Glove Diet was working for Bertram.

I just trained with my two sparring partners over there. A "boxed set"!

'He's a bit confused after that last round.'

Round 2 (office meeting being conducted like a boxing match).

Caricature of Noam Chomsky

Wordplay: Rabbit Punch.