Productivity Ninjas T-Shirts

"Some advice please...How do I squeeze 9 days work into 5 and still see my family?"

Whats ticking away in YOUR filing system?

"Give a sh*t" "Don't give a sh*t"

Desk trays - 'in', 'out', and 'one of these days'.

"I realize we had to liquidate some assets, but don't you think I'd be more productive if I had a desk?"

Time Is Money

"Everyone seek higher ground! The paperwork is rising to a dangerous level."

Targets.

"...simple, we topped the water cooler with energy drinks and productivity rocketed."

There now, that wasn't too difficult was it!

"And so if the pillage numbers don't improve this quarter, I have just one word for you: waterskis."

Workaholics Anonymous meeting: 'No one showed up. Everyone is working.'

It's to stop you getting side-tracked.

'He's still able to do the work of three committees.'

You are here

I came in early to seize the day...but it seized me first.

The other digital divide.

Drinks for the post-caffeinated economy

"She's late for her stress management course."

Man being fed 'Get up and Go' on a drip.

'Stein, have you given any thought to using performance enhancing drugs?'

'This spider's web proves that you've done no work today!'

"I’ve got to wake up early so I’m just going to wear my clothes for tomorrow to bed."

"Please excuse the mess. We had a major paradigm shift."

"That's when we put those expensive organic snacks in the vending machines."

"I think I see the problem."

'Do you have an appointment?'

'These graphs represent productivity between free-range and cubicled workers.'

'Enough is enough, John! You've got to choose. It's either your job or me.'

Hour Glass

"Do as many study days as you can."

Accountancy

I don't consider it "multitasking" when you have to do the same task over and over to get it right!

Workaholic's Toilet

'He does all he can to keep from doing all he could.'