Procedural Plot Enthusiast Mugs

"It's about sex and revenge, except for a short chapter on the Continental Congress."

The worker/the man who monitors the worker/the man who wrote the draft policy guidelines on how to monitor the man monitoring the worker.

'Stop him, he's got the receipe.' Duck running away

"In the hat! In the hat!"

"I don't mind car chases as long as they're car chases about something."

'I've got'em right where I want'em.'

“I’ve got an idea for a story: Gus and Ethel live on Long Island, on the North Shore. He works sixteen hours a day writing fiction. Ethel never goes out, never does anything except fix Gus sandwiches and in the end she becomes a nympho-lesbo-killer-whore. Here’s your sandwich”

10 commandments

"We love your manuscript! It's exactly the sort of big, sprawling epic we've been looking for!"

"We need a plot twist."

'Breast implants? There must be some mistake. I have you down for knee surgery not breast implants!'

He Didn't Know How To Appreciate Nature

"It's a novel about loss, and redemption, and fantastic sex."

Mid-list Author Magazine

Ghost Porn

'Pay no attention to him. He's just a disgruntled former employee.'

"No, I don't mind if you peek,' said the mystery writer to the next victim.

"Give me a couple years, and I can answer your simple question about the new regulations."

"Is this necessary? I already confessed."

'I like the lust,greed and sex - it's just the integrity that bothers me.'

"The report is damning about the lack of strong leadership... I think we need to table some time to consider the option of setting up a policy sub-commitee to look at our options..."

'Eddy Penguin? I'm not sure, officer... Can you desctibe him?'

Conspiracy theorist

"Better than Chekhov"

"Why don't you come back in a couple of months? - I'll be retired then."

'God, how I hate bent coppers.'

'Okay, I have the that backward. Step out of the car and then put your hands up.'

The Jew and Morris both begin to understand each other

"You know who I'd like to see on the team? Stephen Miller."

The Chicken's Revenge.

'You're going to have to trust me on this one, okay?'

Weather soaps