Probiotic Pal Gifts

"I have as many organisms on my tongue as she has in her probiotic, so why won't she let me lick her face."

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

"I love this place—its food, its ambience, and its political goals."

"What I'd give for a stimulating conversation..."

'Isn't he supposed to sit on your shoulder Captain?'

Why would birdie need newspaper?

A mime and his pet parrot talk to one another.

Happy Surrogate Thanksgiving

Doctors

"I'm going to prepare a special dish for Thanksgiving dinner."

"You had me at alternative milk."

"Some day, we should bait our hooks."

'Se Non E Vero' Etc.

They say animals have the sixth sense and the talent to look into the future...

"I've had 720 children. I hope they're all doing well."

"OK, hands up who’s vegan... lactose intolerant... peanut allergies..."

"This is my man cave."

"Whoa. Check it out, Doug. Your ex-wife is sitting right below us with that dolt she ran off with..."

'After years of studying the apes I've finally found a way of being accepted into their group.'

"All those in favor of adding another 5 billion organisms to our probiotic just for the fun of it..."

"If you order from our wellness menu, you get a side of yogurt with every dish."

'You're eating too much roughage.'

"Hundreds of eggs a year, and I've never seen a vet. The Mare has one foal, and it's the Mayo Clinic."

'So, your anger management class is working?'

"Do you think we should get a pet?"

'Thankfully he doesn't talk!'

"I can see that you're a cultured individual..."

"I'll repeat the question! Does this axe belong to you?"

'This is Dr Grumbacher, Professor Emeritus of Comparative Philology. Perhaps he could tell you the difference between an adverb and an adjective.'

"I don't feel so much endangered as I do under funded."

Pirate trying on parrots.

Jolly Roger Inn Toilets - has small parrot urinal on the wall.