Prize Plant Grower T-Shirts

'Be sure to ask George about his tomatoes.'

Watering Money

'You wouldn't happen to be sitting on my entry to the straightest runner bean competition?'

"Did I show you my new climbing hydrangea plants, Mr. Fessler?... Mr. Fessler?"

The Garden

"Sometimes, Cheryl, I wonder why you only invite me along to cocktail parties."

The Velvet Mesquite

'I'll just put them here until the danger of frost passes - probably next April'

"Before invasive species, the only things I could grow were weeds and mildew."

-A garden uses a lot of water. -Most of it perspiration.

A drooping plant is watered via an IV tube.

"The pea's the first vegetable I've ever grown. Can you stuff and mount it for me please?"

Tree Identification Field Guide...

So those are your 'weapons of mass destruction? - Slugs?

urban agriculture

'Whenever he stares out the window like that I know he's about to go into a gardening frenzy.'

'They gave thanks for a bountiful harvest? Their garden must've done better than yours.'

Paving over the window-box

'Sure, beekeepers bees' pollinate billions of dollars worth of crops every year, but what's their firepower?'

Hydroponic Gardening

'You and I are going to have a long talk when I get you home.'

User friendly soil.

'It's only a slug Norman.'

'This pea is the first vegetable that I've ever grown so I would like to have it stuffed and mounted.'

'For heaven's sake Armitage - can't you just accept 2nd place in the best leek category?'

Arctic Hothouse

"It doesn't mean you, Hickford!"

'I need to relax more.' - 'Plants are relaxing.' - 'I need a bonsai.' - '...and here's your care guide.' - 'Say what?' - 'My, my... you're a demanding little bastard, aren't you?'

"The garden is my résumé."

Botanical violinist

Ocotillo

"You give up too easily, dear."

Enjoying The Garden.

Instant winner trash can

'You're excited about winning a traveling toothbrush kit in a sweepstakes after spending $300 on postage and entering 1,500 contests?'